The quieter you become the more you can hear ~ Ram Dass

Friday, October 5, 2012

Mary #29

This is a continuing story.  If you want to read from the beginning, please go to my side bar to the labels and click on story-Mary or click here.

Warning:  This might be disturbing to some people.


When Mary got back to Elizabeth's house, she could see Jimmy sitting on the porch with a glass of wine.

"How's Elizabeth doing" he asked as Mary got out of the car. 

"She’s okay considering.  She went upstairs to rest while I came here.  It's just going to take her some time.” 

"It's going to take everyone time.  I still can't believe Mitch is gone.  It was like one minute he was there and the next he wasn't.  He would be so upset that he can't be here for Elizabeth to help her through her treatments.  He was a very devoted husband all these years” 

Mary didn't say anything. 

"You never liked him much did you? And why all those years did you stay away?” 

"Jimmy I don't think now is the time to get into it.” 

"When will be the time Mary? I have so many questions.” 

Mary suddenly said "The night before his wedding Mitch raped me.” 

"He what?” 

"Mitch raped me.  It was the night of the bachelor party.  Remember, it was at our house.  I came and had some drinks with you all.  The next thing I knew, it was morning and I was in the barn lying next to Mitch and we were both naked.  He must have raped me.” 

"Do you remember it?”

"Not really, did Mitch ever say anything to you about me?” 

"Come to think of it, before the wedding he told me he had a dream about you and him but never got into it.  Did you ever confront him about it?” 

"No, when I saw him at the wedding he acted like nothing happened and I was too shocked.” 

"Mary, why didn't you tell me?"

"I just felt like I couldn't at the time.  It happened the night before the wedding besides he was your best friend. He was marrying my best friend.  I was drunk and didn't know exactly what happened.  I didn't think anyone would believe me". 

"Mary you are my flesh and blood.  If you would have told me, I would have believed you and confronted him about it.” 

"Oh, Jimmy" Mary started to cry and they hugged. 

"Why wouldn't you come home?” 

"I guess all these years, I was afraid and ashamed.  Elizabeth was my best friend and I felt like I betrayed her by not saying anything.  If I didn't come home I didn't have to face everyone and feel the guilt of what happened.” 

"Sis, you had nothing to feel ashamed of or guilty about.  I love you.  I never would have taken his side over yours.  Are you going to say something to Elizabeth about this?” 

"No, and I'd like you not to say anything either.  Jimmy, you are the only other person besides me that knows this.  I've never told a soul.  Was he really a good husband to Elizabeth?”

"Yes, from all I could tell, he's been a faithful and good husband to her.” 

"See, that's what I don't get.  How could he do that to me and then be such a good husband to Elizabeth all this time.  It almost seems like two different people.  Maybe he was so drunk that he did it but didn't even remember.  Or maybe nothing happened and I've just imagined it all these years.  I'm just trying to come to terms with this in my mind now that he's gone.  I think now that he's dead I'm never going to figure out exactly what happened, I'm just going to have to end this chapter in my life and move on from it somehow.” 

"Have you ever gone to a counselor?”

"A counselor, what do you know about them?”

"I went to one when Donna had the breast cancer.  I really needed someone to help me through.  You might consider going to one.”

"Yeah, maybe I will" and she looked at Jimmy in astonishment.  

"Don't forget, you can always talk to me about it.”

"Now about Ma and Pa.  I know it's my fault that they died and I'm really heartbroken and sad about it.”

"Mary, it's really not your fault.  I've been so depressed about losing them.  The only person's fault it was is the person that ran into them" and he grabbed Mary and they hugged again.

Jimmy's cell phone started to ring.  "Hello yeah Donna, I’m here with Mary at Elizabeth's.  I'll be home soon" and he hung up.

"Why don't you go Jimmy?  I have to go and get Elizabeth's clothes then I want to stop at the store and I don't want to leave her too long.”

"Okay, if you’re sure.  I'm glad we talked about this Mary and you trusted me.  I love you Mary, don't forget that.”

She hugged him and said "I won't big brother.  I love you too" and she meant it with all her heart.

She waved to him as he pulled out the driveway and gave a sigh of relief.  She felt like a weight had been lifted off her after all these years.  She felt she finally had a bond with her older brother and that she could trust him.

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